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The "Supposed to" Mindset

Updated: Feb 18, 2020

It has been awhile since we posted an article. This is because Dr. Wu's mother passed away in December due to cancer. This unforeseen incident has further deepen Dr. Wu's thinking and self understanding. We thought we would share the following passage from Dr. Wu with our subscribers:

My mom's passing was unexpected. I saw her in August, and in October she was bedridden.

"Stage 4 cancer" was what the doctor told my family a few days after she was rushed to the hospital.

"I will be fine."

This message appeared on my screen after she was hospitalized. It was not until a few months later I learned that she sent the following message to a friend:

"Help me, I don't want to die!"

She was only 71 when she passed away; she was not supposed to go so early.

Life is not always controllable. This is true in many instances, and especially true when it comes to college application. Most of the students are disappointed when they don't get into their dream school. While many of them would eventually get over the disappointment, a few would take the rejection personally because they thought they were “supposed” to get their first choice (or whatever it is that they have worked so hard towards).

This “supposed to” thinking feels a bit like entitlement. As we go through the ups and downs of life, we learn that life is not perfect and that things will not always go our way. Just like how we can't live forever no matter how hard we try.

Life is not about knowing exactly what will happen, but rather about how we shape ourselves to fit into each new situation.

Life has infinite possibilities. Let’s do the best we can and treasure what we receive along the way, shall we?

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